A Most Embarrassing Adventure

As I sit here drinking coffee and watching a million-year old episode of CSI: Las Vegas, I thought it would be a good time to tell you about what happened on my first night in Omaha.  Talk about embarrassing!

After getting in around 10am, grabbing lunch and spending the rest of the afternoon at the office….my new boss and I decided to go out and have dinner.  Knowing that I like to play slot machines, we went to a casino right on the Iowa border.  We decided we would eat there and play a little.  Before leaving the hotel I came down with a migraine….which later on I realized it was because I was hungry…but I took a couple of Excedrins anyway and washed it down with a cup of coffee.

Once we got to the casino, both of us forgot about eating.  Now, I had just bought an electronic “cigarette” starter kit (which is just a vaporizer — I stopped smoking 10 months ago but still crave one every day) and I brought them with me.  Each little vial of flavored vapor liquid is 18mg of nicotine, which is equal to a pack of cigarettes.  In the 3 hours or so that we were there, I got a bit carried away and vaped a whole vial.  That….along with the Excedrin and coffee on an empty stomach was NOT a good mix.
I got a nice bonus round on a Monopoly Party Train penny slot and ended up losing ony $13 total of my allotted bankroll for this impromtu casino trip.  Shortly after I started to get hot flashes and feel really sick.  I literally sat outside in the 20 degree weather with no coat on and couldn’t even feel the cold.  I waited for my boss and when she came out we talked about getting something to eat finally.

At this point, I felt like I was going to hurl but I wasn’t about to let it fly in the car!  I was like…I got this, I got this…I’m ok…I’m ok…. but by the time we got about 10 minutes away I couldn’t hold it any more.  She pulled into a gas station and thank goodness I made it to the bathroom in time.  There went lunch and the diet coke I had at the casino.  Once I felt better I got some crackers (almost $4 at a gas station!  wtf?) and tried to hold back any more that might be making it’s way to the surface.

For a few minutes I really thought I would be ok and we talked about going somewhere to eat.  About 5 minutes later — yeah, nope…Vesuvius was erupting again.  I asked my boss to pull to the side and almost before she could stop the car I opened the door and let ‘er blow.  I think I might’ve even got some on the back of the car….it was windy.  Once back in the car I decided it was probably best that I just go back to the hotel.

When I got to my room it was a non-stop barf-fest to the point where there was really nothing left.  Laying in the bed not able to move or lift my head….my heart was pounding so fast I was having visions of what my family’s reactions would be when they were told I had a heart attack in Omaha, NE while on a business trip.  No joke…it was that freaky.  I slept a solid 9 hours that night and I don’t think I moved once.  Thank goodness I felt better in the morning but I think it was the first time in at least 13 years that I didn’t have a cup of coffee before heading into work.

Can you imagine?  My first business trip with my new boss at my new job and I was throwing up like a drunken girl gone wild on spring break.  Although, there was no “wild” or “spring break” involved and we were definitely not in Florida.  I hadn’t even had anything to drink! (alcohol-wise) I joked with her about it later…I told her I was a pathetic date and I’m sorry it probably felt like she was driving around with one of her children.

Leave it to me, I swear I couldn’t believe it happened.  I don’t even think my boss ate anything that night either because of me.  You definitely can’t take me anywhere!